May

28

Troy: Homer and Virgil Cast into the Pitt

May 28, 2007 |

Not so much Troy as “oy”, this aberration of an adaptation mutliates its sources like Achilles butchering Trojans.

Okay, so tonight I landed on the Hallmark Channel, which happened to be running (a somewhat expurgated version of) this confused condensation of the Trojan War story (and a fragment of the Aeneid).

It must be granted a few strong points:

  • Brad Pitt’s Achilles delivers a spectacular athleticism that turns hand-to-hand into dogfighting, capturing the spirit of his superiority on the battlefield
  • Eric Bana’s Hector gets at the essential goodness of the Homeric character (husband, father, son, prince, warrior, and patriot– we could use a thousand like him)
  • Peter O’Toole… is still Peter O’Toole, and delivers as best as anyone could, with the beastly script he has to work with.  
  • And it’s generally fun to see Sean Bean as Odysseus, getting the last word.

But… two things best exemplify what’s wrong with this film: Achilles’ relationship with his “cousin Patroclus” and Aeneas scurrying off to save “the sword of Troy”. (And of course, we have to ask: where are the gods?)

And of course there’s the whole ending, where the movie collapses into flaming ruin. (You don’t really give much thought to the absurdity of “Achilles’ heel” until you see the hero dead upon the ground, his ankle transfixed by an arrow.

troypitt.jpgA little more courage and a little less Hollywood and much that was wrong with this could have been forgiven… but that’s not the movie we got.

Cheese of the day: feta Velveeta, crumbled, not melted.

 


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